Why I don't get out more.

    That pretty much sums it up.

Barbecue Swirl

    I think I'll look into purchasing one of their franchises.

Book Excerpt for the Day

    My standards were sliding swiftly.  At first I had insisted I would only work at a company with a mission I believed in.  Then I thought maybe it would be fine as long as I was learning something new.  After that I decided it just couldn’t be evil.  Now I was carefully delineating my personal definition of evil.

    (from Mr. Penumbra’s 24-Hour Bookstore by Robin Sloan)

  7½*/10.  The complete review is here.

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Hand Sanitizer

    True dis.  My wife is a germophobe, but has caught two different viruses since the holidays.  One was bronchitis, the other a stomach flu.

    In fairness, it should be noted that she gave me the latte.  I've been nusring a sore throat and a persistent cough for the past three days.

Express Shipping

    Jeez.  Some of us would just order the Kindle version.

Thursday Surrealism

    Reportedly, there are 28 animals in the picture.  I counted up to around 25 of them, but was getting confused as to which ones I'd already counted.  So I fully believe the "28" total.

Listening

    Of course, I was listening.  But I didn't know there'd be a quiz on it..

Book Excerpt for the Day

    “They’re shooting to kill, you realize.”

    “Of course I realize it!  What in hell did you do?”

    “They seem to think I’m one of the terrorists, the ones with the nuke.”

    “And are you?”

    “Are you nuts?  This investigation has been a balls-up from the beginning.”

    “They seem pretty damn convinced.”

    “You yourself said they were stupid.”

    “I said you were stupid.”

    “You never said I was stupid.”

    “Yeah, but I was thinking it.”

    (from Gideon’s Corpse by Douglas Preston and Lincoln Child)

  6*/10.  The complete review is here.

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Salvador Dali Monday

    RIP, Salvador Dali.  Died 01/23/89.  This is one of my favorite Dali paintings, although, truth be told, I have about 100 of those.

    It is, however, my favorite Dali title: 

50 Abstract Paintings which Seen from Two Metres Change into Three Lenins Disguised as Chinese and Seen from Six Metres Appear as the Head of a Royal Tiger

You are what you eat

    I no longer remember the artist's name, but we saw a bunch of these portraits when we were at the Louvre in 2003.  They were freakin' awesome.

Public Service Announcement: Wine Edition

    Don't let a good bottle of wine cloud your judgment.  You're welcome.

Star Wars Friday!

    May the forsythia be with you.

Book Excerpt for the Day

    “Good to see you,” W said gloomily.  “How’s things?”

    “Well,” Smith said, “our engine room’s full of killer frogs, our convoy got blown up and we’ve opened a portal to Hell.  Still, mustn’t grumble.”

    “Killer frogs, eh?”  W nodded thoughtfully.  “While I bear amphibians no ill will – indeed, man has much to learn from the toad – an engine room full of them sounds excessive.”

    (from A Game of Battleships, by Toby Frost)

     7½*/10.  The full review is here.

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Quote for the Day

Creepy Mimes

Sleeping in Winter

    Even here in Arizona, this pretty much describes my winter sleeping habits.  You just have to throw in two small dogs trying to nudge me off the bed all night long.

Book Excerpt for the Day

    He had entered Shaor’s territory and had escaped unscathed.  He had power over food; he could make it inedible for one but succulent for another.  His soldiers had repeatedly defeated Shaor’s band.  To their simple, degenerate minds there was only one thing to do when faced by a god more powerful than their own: convert.

    (from Elantris by Brandon Sanderson)

  9*/10.  The complete review is here.

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The Wall

    LMFAO.

Motivational Thursday (Writer's Edition)

    A heaven-sent idea is great.  But sometimes a divine kick in the a$$ might be needed as well.

Key Master

    Yessirree.  My coat pocket's a regular master at this.

English Grammar

    This is oh-so-true.  I learned a poopload of English grammar by taking three years of French.

Guardians of the Galaxy 2

    Guardians of the Galaxy 2 - coming to your local theater later this year!

Punny Sunday

    Admittedly, if helps if you're an avid chess player.  

Voodoo Dolls

   Really now.  This should work.  I'm surprised no one's though of it before.

Book Excerpt for the Day

    “It must be hard, your job,” she said.  “Telling people this sort of thing.”

    He nodded and looked away.  For a moment he thought of the old squad room joke about the easiest way to do next-of-kin notification.  When Mrs. Brown opens the door, you say, “Are you the widow Brown?”

    (from Trunk Music by Michael Connelly)

    9*/10.  The complete review is here.

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Fishing for Insults

My Lucky Neighbors

    This is really true.  Sometimes they get it as 60 decibels.  Sometimes they get it at 120 decibels.

Writing Tip

   As a reader/reviewer, I can say that, beyond the humor, there is a lot of truth to this.  There are some authors that can mesmerize me with long and obscure words.  But in the hands of an amateur, such things are awkward at best, and grating at worst.

Book Excerpt for the Day

    “Well, it is a fact, Jamie, that the TARDIS was not really designed for, umm, the purposes to which I put her.  My people, who have mastered the technologies of time themselves, rather frown on mucking about with time by anybody else.  And so, you see, the TARDIS is specifically designed to react when she detects evidence of any such, ah -“

    “Mucking about.”

    “Quite so.”

    (from Doctor Who – The Wheel Of Ice by Stephen Baxter)

    8*/10.  The complete review is here.

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Science Sunday