Monday Math

    An exquisite example of thinking outside the box.  Alas, the kid's still gonna flunk the class.

Banned from the Barbecue Grill

    Well, this is overstated.  It's true that I am banned from the barbecue pit.  But that's only because I once magically turned hamburger patties into charcoal briquettes.

Poetry Saturday

The fog comes

on little cat feet.

It sits looking

over harbor and city

on silent haunches

and then moves on.

    Give me Carl Sandburg over Robert Frost any day.

Pets and Beds

    We have three relatively small dogs and they all insist on sleeping in the bed with us, and taking up about 90% of the sleeping space.  I think the bed pictured above is a wonderful invention, although we'd need three puppy-holes.

    Alas, Liz has pointed out that they'd still want to sleep on the top.

Quantum Physics Thursday!

    Exquisitely excellent.

Book Excerpt for the Day

    He leapt the gap to the dock, dazzled a blindingly white grin, and snatched the remains of the sandwich out of the Emperor’s hand.  “Ah, Jah’s love on ye, Uncle, bringing de rippin’ grinds to I’n’I after so long at sea.”

    Bummer barked and growled.  The Rasta-blond had their sandwich.

    “Ah, me doggie, dreadies,” said the Rasta.  “Jah’s blessings on ye.”  He knelt and scratched Bummer behind the ears.

    The stranger smelled of coconut oil, weed, and the undead, and Bummer was going to bite him as soon as he was finished having his ears scratched.

    (from Bite Me by Christopher Moore)

    8½*/10.  The complete review is here.

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Pun Day Tuesday

Dancing With The Stars

    Tonight's the season premiere of the 2015 fall season of Dancing With The Stars.  And you know what that means.

   Two hours for me to play on the computer and/or read a book!!  Gawd, I love reality shows!

Book Excerpt for the Day

    There was a weight on his chest, and it was warm, comfortably so.  He instinctively cradled it and felt arms go around his hips and to his back.  For no reason, Joe felt the moment was framed in gold.  He had just enough time to see her dark tresses spread about his chest as he and this golden person fell.  A perfect moment.  A perfect meeting.

    The force of his body hitting the floor unmercifully interrupted all that.

    “Are you an imbecile?  Get up and run!  Go!”

    (from Average Joe & The Extraordinaires by Belart Wright)

    4½*/10.  The complete review is here.

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Music Trivia Saturday

I Say Tomato...

    This is another cartoon that took me far too long to "get".  And I knew what punchline they were trying to achieve, to boot.  Pronouncing the "a" wrong was my undoing.

I know just how you feel...

    I know some people like this.

The Planets

Book Excerpt for the Day

    The oldest surviving grocery list that I know of is from circa A.D. 80, found at the site of an old Roman fort in the northern U.K.  Someone needed pork, bread, wine and oil.  As of the moment I am writing this, the most recent found grocery list in my collection is from St. Louis, Missouri, circa A.D. 2006, found in the street in front of Jay’s International Foods store.  Someone needed lunchmeat, poultry, bread, olive oil and several other items.  Almost two thousand years passed between the crafting of those lists, yet they are nearly identical.

    (from Milk Eggs Vodka by Bill Keaggy)

    8*/10.  The complete review is here.

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Lollygagging

    And we won't even mention shilly-shallying

RIF Sunday

    I really want one of these, but I'd have to add either a second floor, or a basement, to the house. 

Book Excerpt for the Day

    Seth’nerak felt the mental link sever.  Marcovius neither knew how to sever it, nor had the ability to even if he did.  It was of Seth’s making.  That only meant one thing.  He grinded his teeth together in anger as th darkness that seemed to envelop him only grew.  “It would seem someone has killed my General,” he said flatly.  He had almost said my only friend.  But he was evil, after all.  One must maintain some measure of appearance.

    (from The Crimson Blade by Corey Soreff)

    6*/10.  The complete review is here.

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To repeat...

Because Marriage is a Sacred Rite

    What a f*cking hypocrite.

Math Wednesday

    Heh.  I know some schmucks who are only in the top 10%.  Idjits.

Remembering Hurricane Katrina

Book Excerpt for the Day

    Humans spread over their world.  They spread in waves across the universe, sprawling and brawling and breeding and dying and evolving.  There were wars, there was love, there was life and death.  Minds flowed together in great rivers of consciousness, or shattered in sparkling droplets.  There was immortality to be had, of a sort, a continuity of identity through copying and confluence across billions upon billions of years.

    Everywhere humans found life: crude replicators, of carbon or silicon or metal, churning meaninglessly in the dark.

    Nowhere did they find mind – save what they brought with them or created – no other against which human advancement could be tested.

    They came to understand that they would forever be alone.

    (from Manifold: Origin by Stephen Baxter)

    9½*/10.  The complete review is here.

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Political Views

    There's a ha-ha factor to this graph, of course.  But beyond that, I think its creator managed to present a set of balanced, and surprisingly accurate, viewpoints for each of the three major political blocs in the US.

Joy of Cooking - Joy of Cooking (Album)

Artist  :  Joy of Cooking

Album  :  Joy of Cooking  (1971)

Genre  :  Folk Rock

- Tracks (favorites in pink) -

01. Hush
02. Too Late, But Not Forgotten
03. Down My Dream
04. If Some God  (Sometimes You Gotta Go Home)
05. Did You Go Downtown
06. Dancing Couple
07. Brownsville/Mockingbird
08. Red Wine At Noon
09. Only Time Will Tell Me
10. Children's House

    Joy of Cooking was a short-lived folk-rock band, formed in 1967.  This is their debut, eponymous album.  It came out in 1971; by 1972 the band was split up.

    I picked this LP in Seattle for about $8.  Amazon has a 2011 CD version of it for $39.99 (an import, probably), and a much more reasonably-priced MP3 version for only $9.49.  There are no bonus tracks included.  Visually, the album was in good shape, but it had a lot of scratches, and I had to use the de-scratcher program to clean it up.  The software did a nice job.

    The two stellar tracks are Did You Go Downtown and the hybrid Brownsville/Mockingbird.  The whole album is good, and a fine example of a "hippie California" sound that sprang up in the greater San Francisco area (Joy of Cooking is out of Berkeley) in the late 60's.

    According of Wikipedia, Joy of Cooking is reputed to be the first rock band to be fronted by a pair of women.  The band's sound is a pleasant fusion of rock, folk, jazz, and blues.  A number of the songs were feminist-themed, which put them 5-10 years ahead of their time.

    Sadly, Joy of Cooking only put out three albums before disappearing into the San Francisco fog.  I searched YouTube for live videos of their performances, but didn't find any.  I also picked up their third album, Castles, at the record store in Seattle.  It is equally good, and I will post a review of it sometime in the future.

    The Wikipedia article on JoC is sparse.  I have no idea whether any or all of the founding members are still with us, but I for one would love to see them get together again, if only for a single reunion tour.

Art Appreciation Friday

    Awesome.

Monty Python Holy Grail Quote

    I was thinking it was a LOTR quote, but that was slightly different.

Wild Wildlife Wednesday

Book Excerpt for the Day

    “I don’t believe you’re even the daughter of a river spirit.  You probably just made that up too.”

    “I did not!  I was Metricia’s favourite daughter.  Second favourite.  Third at the very least.”

    Bremusa glared at her in the way she’d once glared at enemies on the battlefield.  “Did you inherit any of your mother’s powers?”

    “Of course!”

    “Like what?”

    “I can make daisies and buttercups grow really quickly.  Look!”

    (from The Goddess of Buttercups and Daisies by Martin Millar)

    8*/10.  The complete review is here.

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Coke vs. Pepsi

    Really, this seems about right to me.  I don't know who the Coca Cola marketing peeps are here in Phoenix, but they need to get their butts in gear and recapture some of the market share back from Pepsi.

Sunday Pun Day

LSD and Mannequins

    I'm happy to say that this has never happened to me.  But there are some pictures of me in compromising positions with some nude female statues at the Phoenix Civic Center from a long, long time ago.

Fruit Juice Diet

    Just started this diet tonight.  So far, so good.  Hic!

Book Excerpt for the Day

    He (Ullholm) considered that there had been no law and order in society since the thirties.

    He put the greatly increasing crime and brutality down to the fact that the police were not given proper military training and no longer wore sabers.

    The introduction of right-hand traffic was a scandalous blunder that had made the situation much worse in a community that was already undisciplined and morally corrupt.

    “Furthermore, it increases promiscuity,” he said.  “You see what I mean, don’t you?”

    “Huh,” said Ronn.

    (from The Laughing Policeman by Maj Sjowall and Per Wahloo)

    9*/10.  The complete review is here.

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Light bulb Joke

    Yeah, that's about all that comes out of this a$$hole's mouth. 

Tuesday Pun Day

Chemists and Romance Novels

   Well, of course.  The similes have to be scientifically valid.

Book Excerpt for the Day

    While there were many negatives to having an apprentice with the paltry cognitive capabilities of Rimpertuz, there were advantages to it as well.  It had been years since Treneth had lifted a shovel, for example.

    “Rimpertuz,” he said, I feel it may be time for you to begin planning your future.  You need to do things you can really own, you see?”

    “I do?”

    “Would I say so if it weren’t true?”

    Rimpertuz didn’t reply.

    (from A Quest of Undoing, by John P. Logsdon and Christopher P. Young)

     6*/10.  The full review is here.

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Tonight's Forecast

    We're having a bit of a heat wave here in Phoenix.  Yesterday, it hit 117°F.  Right now today (5:00 PM), it's 114°F.  And tomorrow's high will be 115°F.

    And in case you're thinking, "yeah, but it's a dry heat", no, it isn't.  This is monsoon season, which means we're having Houston humidity.

Risk - the Truth

    The other piece of sage advice I have about Risk - "Never get into a land war in Asia."

Simon

    I don't mean to brag, but I will kick everyone's butt in Simon.